Happiness

 

…to be continued…

Some February Pages

“Emma went to bread-making class taught by our neighbor and her daughters.  She learned all about the bread-making process and even made her own artisan bread loaf in the shape of a turtle!  She came home with her own apron and another batch of dough ready to be baked.  The splash of flour on her nose completed the outfit! 

Feb 12, 2011”

Tyson got a telescope for Christmas.  One Sunday afternoon, we did some science experiments for fun! 

Not One of my Better Choices

Many years ago (close to 20 now), I had a very close friend.  We had been friends in Junior High School, but as we entered High School, our interests changed and so did our group of friends.  We talked causally, but weren’t very close anymore.  I’d heard from a little bird that she wanted to be friends still.  My new “cool” friends convinced me to do something that I still regret to this day. 

“We” wrote her a letter (WAY before the internet) and told her that I was sorry that we weren’t friends anymore and that I wanted to be here friend again.  Then, at the end of the letter, I wrote…”April Fool’s Day,” along with saying some things I regret.  I know…it STILL kills me to think of that.  I listened to some people I really wanted to be friends with.  They were popular, cool, fun, and they liked me.  I realized my horrible, horrible mistake almost immediately. 

No one needed to tell me how this girl felt, even though I heard about it, because I felt horrible about what I had done.  Whether we were friends or not, she did not deserve that.  It was cruel, it was mean-spirited, and it hurt someone…someone who had once been a close friend. 

In my defense, I was young.  I was trying hard to fit in to high school.  I was trying to fit in with my cool friends.  Because they said it…I did it.  That was the first and last time. 

Later that week, I called this girl and begged her forgiveness.  This sweet soul immediately forgave.  Of course, I didn’t feel like I had earned it back because I know that what I did hurt her and humiliated her.  I spent a long time trying to make it up to her.  To prove to her that she was good.  That she did not deserve what I had done.  To help improve her self-worth. Fifteen-plus years later, we have reconnected via Facebook, but that memory will never leave me.  I’m actually glad that I remember it. 

Remembering that people have emotions and feelings and can so easily be hurt and my own experience of doing that hurting has helped me try to think of the effect of my actions before I make them.  No, I’m not perfect.  Please don’t think that’s what I’m saying. 

I have been on both sides of the equation, as I’m sure most people have (or maybe not), but I’m sure everyone’s been hurt by something someone said to them…about them…to others…etc.  Trying to remember that hurt can change into something wonderful.  If, instead, we try to make people feel better about themselves, feel happier, feel worthy…well, it may be a dream, but I think that would be wonderful.

As horrible as it is to remember the hurt I caused another is the peace that comes because I made it up to her.  I apologized…repeatedly…and I proved to her, with words and actions, that she was my friend and that she was a good person.  For that, I will forever be thankful. 

Do You Mind? Or Do You Matter?

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.          ~Dr. Seuss

I love quotes.  Sometimes, other people can say things much more eloquently than I can.  I’ve been thinking about the above quote…a lot… for the last few weeks and wondering if it’s true or not.  I’m thinking that it sounds good on paper, but really, I think it’s really easy to “matter” and still “mind.”

If you’ve managed in life to never get your feelings hurt by someone you care about, raise your hand.  That’s what I thought.  I think it’s very easy to speak your mind to those who do matter and have them mind.  So, if they do mind, does that mean that person doesn’t matter?  Or does it mean you really shouldn’t really speak your mind to some people or about some things because people will mind?

My self-esteem and self-worth have taken a bit of a beating recently by some things that were said.  So, that above quote has been rattling around in my brain.  I’d like to think that I matter and that I just happened to mind too.  I repeat, that’s what I would LIKE to think.  Maybe not what I’m feeling just yet. 

I have written and rewritten the remainder of this blog entry three times now. The two previous attempts have left me sounding horribly depressed and rambling.  I can’t say I’m still not rambling, but I am not horribly depressed.  Really, Mom…I’m not. 

That said, I do have feelings.  I wear my heart on my sleeve sometimes. And the downside of that is that when my feelings get hurt, boy do they get hurt.

I’m glad I have people in my life who help me remember that I DO matter.  Thank you for that!

Design Star Competition

I am in a designer competition at Scrap Matters and the submissions for round one are in. And you can download them all for FREE! Just go to the gallery HERE, but you have to be logged in to view them. I can't tell you which entry is mine, but can you guess? 

The colors were not really my style, but I found a theme and went with it. I hope it is enough to get me through to the second round! Fingers crossed!

Happy Monday! 

New Etsy Shop Opening for my digital design

Check out my design blog, Little Penguins Designs, for some exciting news!  I’ve opened up an Etsy shop for my scrapbooking stuff!  Check it out! 

January Happenings

New Year’s Day was spent playing with Christmas toys.  Tyson got to check out his new microscope and Austin played with the new train parts he got.  Emma played with her toys too, but somehow I forgot to get a picture of her! 

Tyson earned his Wolf Badge in Cub Scouts this month, just in time to move up to Bears in March after his birthday! 

The kids had fun playing in the snow while I snow blowed.  Tyson helped Austin make his own snowball (see photo on the right, above).  Emma built a “snow chair,” which was lovely to sit it when since she didn’t have snow pants on. 

Tyson’s Jr. Jazz basketball team had a WONDERFUL January.  They had an undefeated month and Tyson scored his first basket of the season this month too!